Why who’s beside us can be just as important as what we’re going through.
Mental health doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Whether someone is navigating a new diagnosis, living with a long-term condition, or going through a tough season—the people around them matter. More than we realize.
Family. Friends. Partners. Chosen family. Community. These relationships can either build bridges to healing… or unintentionally deepen the pain.
Why Support Systems Matter
When you’re struggling with your mental health, even the basics can feel impossible. Getting out of bed, answering texts, making appointments, feeding yourself—some days, it takes everything just to be. That’s where support systems step in.
The presence of even one safe, understanding person can make a huge difference. A hug. A “thinking of you” message. Sitting quietly together when there are no words. These aren’t small gestures—they’re lifelines.
For Charissa and me, we’ve both experienced what it’s like to walk through mental health challenges without the support we needed. There were times when it felt like no one saw us—or truly understood what we were going through. That kind of loneliness can be devastating. But then we found each other. And suddenly, we weren’t alone anymore.
Having someone who gets it, who listens without judgment, who holds space when the world feels heavy—that kind of connection? It’s everything. And it’s a reminder that healing doesn’t always begin with fixing the problem. Sometimes, it begins with someone simply sitting beside you in it.
How Loved Ones Can Help
Not everyone knows what to say or how to show up—and that’s okay. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being present. Here are a few meaningful ways family and friends can support someone struggling:
🫶 Listen without trying to fix – Sometimes the most healing words are “I’m here” and “That sounds really hard.”
💬 Normalize mental health conversations – Talk about it like you would physical health.
⏳ Be patient – Healing is nonlinear. There will be ups, downs, and days that don’t make sense.
🧠 Educate yourself – Learn about what your loved one is experiencing. Understanding helps compassion grow.
💌 Offer practical support – Help with tasks, check in, attend appointments if invited.
🌱 Respect boundaries – Support looks different for everyone. Let them guide what they need (and don’t need).
🤝 Encourage help-seeking – Gently support them in accessing therapy, support groups, or other resources—but never shame them if they’re not ready.
When Family or Friends Aren’t Supportive
We also want to name something important: not everyone has supportive family or friends—and that doesn’t mean they’re less deserving of care or community.
Sometimes chosen family becomes the real lifeline. Sometimes it’s a therapist, an online group, a support program, or just one person who sees you fully. If your birth family or current circle isn’t safe or supportive, that is not your fault. You still deserve connection, understanding, and love.
Charissa and I know that feeling all too well—and we want you to know it gets better. There are people out there who will meet you with the care and understanding you’ve always deserved. And sometimes, the support we give each other becomes the most powerful form of healing.
If You’re Supporting Someone
Supporting someone with a mental illness can feel heavy at times—especially if you don’t know what they’re going through. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. It’s okay to not always get it right. Your effort matters more than perfection.
But don’t forget: you deserve support too. Take care of yourself. Set healthy boundaries. Reach out for your own help when needed. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and you’re not selfish for tending to your needs.
Let’s Talk About It
🌿 Have you had a friend or family member support you during a mental health struggle? What helped?
🌿 Have you ever felt unsupported—and how did that affect your healing?
🌿 What kind of support would’ve made the difference for you?
Let’s keep breaking the silence. Let’s keep having the conversations that heal.